==============================================================================
The Cryonic Woman Written by J. Stewart Burns
Directed by Mark Ervin
==============================================================================
Production code: 2ACV19 Original Airdate: Sun, 13-Dec-2000
TV Guide synopsis:
After a prank gets Fry, Leela and Bender fired, Fry lucks
into a job that reunites him with his previously frozen
20th-century girlfriend, who suggests they go somewhere
quieter, like the year 4000.
Opening theme promotion:
Not a substitute
for Human Interaction
Opening theme cartoon:
[[[Mickey Mouse]]]
Joe Klemm:
... Fry never had a full education?
... the Hollywood Hills sign resembles the word "HOOD"?
Dave:
... Morbo, among others, is immortalized in concrete outside
Loew's Quaddafi's Mann's Grauman's Chinese Theater.
... The St. Louis Arch, the Golden Gate Bridge, the Leaning Tower of
Pisa and the Great Wall of China all still exist in 3001? (The
stainless steel Arch structure has obviously been strengthened
and reinforced since its construction in 1965.)
Jonathan Papish:
... That when the little kids were starting off their skateboarding
race type thing, they counted to three in Hebrew: Echad, Shtaim,
Shalosh (Not sure of the spelling)?
- Starring - Billy West (Fry, Dr. Zoidberg, Prof. Farnsworth) - Katey Sagal (Leela) - John DiMaggio (Bender, Cryogenics' boss) - Tress MacNeille (Butch's mom) - Guest Starring - David Herman (Terry) - Phil Lamarr (Hermes Conrad, kid in LA gang) - Lauren Tom (Amy Wong) - Sarah Silverman (Michelle) - Kath Soucie (Butch) - Special appearance by - Pauly Shore (Himself) - Also Starring - Maurice LaMarche ()
+ The Bionic Woman (TV Series)
- Episode Title {JK}
+ Fantasy Island (TV Series)
- Fantasy Planet {JK}
+ Superman III (Movie)
- When Superman is turned "evil" by a corrupted form of Kryptonite,
he pulls the prank of straightening the Leaning Tower of Pisa.
At the end pof the movie, after his heroic qualities are restored,
he sets it back to normal. The additional joke is that an Italian
souvenir vendor fumes each time Superman visits, smashing shelves
of his no-longer-accurate miniature replicas of the tower. {ES}
+ Calvin and Hobbes (Comic Strip)
- Bender's "Anti-Mugging You Fund" is very similar to a strip where
a bully asks Calvin for money for the "Let Calvin Live Through
Recess Fund". {RJM}
+ Hannibal Crossing the Alps
- Fry's idea of "A daring daylight robbery of Fort Knox on elephant
back" probably alludes to the idea of the Carthregenian general
Hannibal, who, during the Punic Wars, attempted to attack Rome
from the north on elephant back, even though it meant crossing
the hazardous Alps. He failed miserably and by the time he and
what was left of his army reached Rome, the war was over. "That's
the dumbest idea I ever heard!" {RJM}
+ "Houston, we have a problem."
- This quote by the members of the Apollo 13 mission was parodied
by the Indian cryogenics boss, "Calcutta, we have a problem". {RJM}
- What makes sense, because in Calcutta is also a station for launches. {MH}
+ Lord of the Flies (Novel by Sir William Golding)
- Children attempt to start their own civilization after being
marooned on an island in the South Pacific. It worked about as
nicely as the one in LA, but fortunately they didn't have guns. {RJM}
+ Back to the Future and Back to the Future II (Movies)
- Marty McFly escapes bullies in a dangerous skateboard chase
(holding on to the back of cars, etc.) The chase set in the
future (2015) was especially similar. {RJM}
- [2ACV12] Bender choking Fry {jl}
- [1ACV01] Michelle appears, and dumps Fry in the same way.
Applied cryogenics lab reappears.
Also, events of this episode are referred to.
- Cups in the kitchen:
UNIVERSE'S
#1
SPACE
PILOT
UNIVERSE'S
#4307697
DELIVERY
DOY
- On Applied Cryogenics building:
APPLIED
CRYOGENICS
"It seems to work OK"
Larry F The Leaning Tower of Pisa has somehow been salvaged after the aliens destroyed it, and moved back to Pisa. When Michelle went to have herself frozen, she didn't notice Fry. And when Fry woke up, he didn't notice Michelle. If Fry ever mentioned her name to Leela, why didn't she recognize it, assuming Leela had access to a list of upcoming defrostees. It would make sense that she would, since Fry knew that Pauly Shore was going to be defrosted soon. Perhaps, she didn't want Fry to know that his girlfriend would be defrosted. She does seem to be reluctantly interested in him. Why would Leela have to give Fry a delivery boy career chip? The Professor gave him one in the first episode. "Oh boy! I'm a delivery boy."
[None]
Joe Klemm "Weird Al" Yankovic, one of the celebrities in cryogenics, is considered by some people to be the king of novelty music. Writing and performing comical songs and parodies since his teens, with him finally making it big with My Bologna, Weird Al had since become the main novelty music act today. Among some of his best parodies include Eat It (a spoof of Beat It), Like a Surgeon (a Madonna parody), Fat (a Michael Jackson parody where he is extremely fat), and Smells Like Nirvana (a Nirvana spoof about the band and how no one can understand their lyrics). Encino Man is a 1992 comedy starring Pauly Shore. The tale tells of two college students who, while building a pool, unearth and culturize a caveman who has been frozen for many years. The film itself was the start of the way unnecessary film career of Shore, who at the time was working for MTV. Robert J. Muldoon "Weird Al" Yankovic is in his "Eat It!" jacket and t-shirt. He looks like he did in 1984 (a clone?) as his hair is less bushy and he looks more like Kenny G than Gallagher. He actually appears to be dancing. Fry apparently wasn't much of a fan judging from his expression and the way he said, "Noooo!"
% At Planet Express. Fry and Bender play with the model ship (inside the real
% one.
Fry: Whoo! [Imitates spaceship flying] Giant space robot, this is Captain
Fry of the U.S.S. Planet Express ship. We come in peace.
Bender: Tough luck!
% Knocks the model ship out of Fry's hands and breaks it to pieces. They
% both laugh.
Fry: Well, we destroyed the toy spaceship. Now what are we going to do?
Bender: Hey, look! The keys to the real spaceship.
Fry: Do you think we should?
Bender: Yes, I do.
% At the kitchen. Leela washes a cup.
Prof.: Leela, have you seen the keys to the spaceship?
Leela: [Pats her pockets] Uh, I must have left them onboard.
Prof.: Oh, well... I mean, what!
Leela: Relax, the ship's not going anywhere. I anchored it with the
unbreakable diamond tether.
Prof.: Ooh!
% They see the ship taking off though the window.
Leela: Oh, no.
Amy: [Yells in Chinese]
Zoidberg: This isn't good for Zoidberg.
% The ship takes off, hauling the Planet Express building after itself on
% the diamond tether.
%
Fry: Whoo! Yeah!
Bender: Yeah!
% The rest of the crew gets thrown against the wall, screaming. Fry and Bender
% takes the ship for around the world trip. They pass St. Louis Arch and the
% Golden Gate Bridge. When they pass the Great Wall, they break a hole in it.
% The Mongols ride in.
Bender: Hey, Fry... I'm steering with my ass.
Fry: That's the best thing I ever saw.
% They pass the leaning tower of Pisa. The ship hits it, straightening it out.
% People shout at them. The Planet Express building hits it too. The tower
% leans the other way. People cheer. The tower falls.
%
% They return back to NNY. Fry and Bender come out of the ship, laughing.
Fry: That was great!
Bender: And no one suspects a thing.
% The rest of the crew stand right there and look at them angrily.
% Fry and Bender gasp. One wall of the building collapses.
Bender: And that's how we learned our lesson. [Fry nods]
Prof.: You've gone too far this time. All three of you.
Leela: What did I do?
Prof.: You left the keys in the ignition. I mean, look at those two. Wasn't
it obvious what would happen?
Fry: Yeah, Leela. We're all very disappointed in you.
Prof.: I should fire you three right now. But I'm just not that
cold-hearted. [Whispers to Hermes]
Hermes: You're all fired.
% Fry, Leela and Bender walk out the door, looking sad.
Zoidberg: Good-bye, friends, I'll miss you. [The door closes] Good riddance to
them. Now Zoidberg is the popular one.
Prof.: Yes, yes, let's all talk to Zoidberg
% Talking at once:
Prof.: So, Zoidberg... what's new?
Amy: Hey, Zoidberg, I've been thinking ... do you think we could go
out?
Hermes: Tell me Zoidberg, Is it 'carapace or carapass'?
Zoidberg: Oh, you know...
% Later, Leela, Fry and Bender are sitting on a park bench.
Fry: What are we supposed to do for money? All I've got is my Frequent
Taffy Eater's Card... my first mustache... and a picture of me and
my old girlfriend Michelle, and that ski instructor she was just
friends with.
Bender: [To the passing man] Pardon me, brother... Care to donate to the
Anti-Mugging You Fund?
Leela: [Slaps his wrist] We don't need to beg, Bender. For God's sake,
we're not veterans.
Fry: Well, what do you suggest? A daring daylight robbery of Fort Knox on
elephant back? That's the dumbest thing I ever heard.
Leela: No, we can get jobs.
Bender: But we just had jobs.
Leela: Fortunately, I still have our old career chips.
Fry: Our what?
Leela: Career chips. You remember - they assign you the job you're best at.
[Fry stares blankly] I tried to give you one and you ran away? [Fry
still stares blankly] It's how we met?
Fry: And then what happened?
Leela: [Sighs] Just give me your hand. [Implants his chip]
Fry: Ow!
Leela: Baby. [Implants her own chip] Ow!
% At the APPLIED CRYOGENICS building.
Leela: I'd like to reapply for my old job. Counseling defrostees and
assigning them careers.
Boss: Oh, I was hoping you would come back. I even saved your poster of a
chimp expressing your distaste for Mondays.
Leela: Monday monkey lives for the weekend, sir.
Boss: Just put your hand under the scanner so I can verify your career
chip. [Leela puts her hand under the scanner] Calcutta, we have a
problem.
Leela: Delivery boy? I must have mixed up the chips. It's a simple...
Boss: [Scans Fry] Oh, here's our cryogenic counselor. Do you like Mondays?
Fry: They're okay.
Boss: Then we'll have to redecorate your office. How do you feel about it
helping to be crazy to work here but not being necessary?
Bender: Hey! Let's see what it says about me. [Takes out a severed arm]
Boss: [Scans it. It says "PRIME MINISTER OF NORWAY"] Welcome aboard, sir.
% At a cryotube.
Terry: Remember, when the tube opens, say "Welcome to the world of
tomorrow!"
Fry: Hey, I was frozen. I think I know what people wanna hear when they
first wake up.
% Tube beeps. A man comes out of it, disoriented.
Fry: Bathroom's that way. [The man runs that way]
% Later, in the Probulator room.
Fry: So, while you're on the probulator, tell me what brings you to the
future.
Man: Oh, well, I wanted to meet Shakespeare and I figured that time was
cyclical.
Fry: Nope, straight line. [Probulator beeps] Ah! the probulator's done.
Man: Oh, that wasn't so bad.
Fry: Oh, wait, it hasn't started yet. [Beep. The man screams] Okay, it's
about to start. [Beep. The man screams harder]
% The next tube beeps and opens up. An old man is inside.
Bender: [Wearing a fly outfit] Welcome to the future, human slave. [Old man
gasps. Bender laughs] Ah, relax, chum. I'm not really a giant fly.
[Takes off the mask] I'm a horrible robot! [Makes a scary face and
advances on the man, spinning his head]
% The man gasps in terror and backs up into the tube.
Bender: Kill all humans! [Roars]
% The old man holds on to his heart.
Terry: Dear God! He's having a heart attack!
% Bender shoves the old man into the tube and shuts the door.
Bender: They'll probably find a cure for that in the future.
Terry: We have a cure for it now!
Bender: Oh, good, then you won't mind if I use this. [Puts on a gorilla
mask]
% Switch to Fry inside a cryotube. The tube beeps. Fry gets out,
% stretches and yawns.
Fry: Nothing like a power nap.
% He goes to get some coffee. He opens up a tube with the old man.
Old man: Flies, flies and gorillas!
% Fry gets some cream and shut the door.
%
% Bender comes out of the Probulator room.
Bender: Stay beautiful, dollface. Ooh, that probulator sure knows how to
please a man. So, what's for lunch?
Fry: I ordered a pizza.
% Leela walks in a pizza delivery uniform and a pizza in her hands.
Leela: Pizza delivery for... [reads] I.C. Wiener. [Fry and Bender giggle]
Yeah, very funny. Now cough up the $12.95.
Fry: Sorry, but if it's not here in half an hour, it's free.
Leela: It's only been 23 minutes.
Fry: Well, uh, I've got 33 minutes.
% Leela puts the box on the table and pushes the button on it.
Box: It's only been 23 minutes, you dumb cannoli. You got a problem? We
can take it outside.
Fry: Okay, I'll fight the box. I think I can take him.
Leela: Fry, just pay me. I still owe $30 on this uniform.
Box: 35, you stupid meatball!
% Later and the cryoroom.
Bender: Who should we unfreeze next?
Fry: [Look at a guy with a rifle and a grenade in his hand] No. [Weird
Al Yancovic] No! [Pauly Shore] Oh, my God! It's Pauly Shore!
Bender: All right! [Puts on the gorilla mask]
% In the Probulator room.
Fry: Mr. Shore, I loved you in Bio-Dome. You sure caused some trouble in
that bubble!
Shore: Rest assured, if it rhymes, I can cause trouble in it.
Fry: Hey, now that you're in the future you can go live in an actual
biodome.
Shore: An unattractive prospect. While researching for the role I ran
computer simulations demonstrating incontrovertibly that the whole
bio-enclosure concept is fundamentally flawed... be it expressed via
dome, sphere, cube... or even the stately tetrahedron... buddy!
[Smacks his lips]
Fry: Oh. So, how did you wind up getting frozen?
Shore: Well, while filming Encino Man my intellectual curiosity re:
cryogenics was peaked and I resolved to freeze the weasel.
Fry: The weasel! Ha-ha!
Shore: Hey, listen, Skippy. I was supposed to be unfrozen in Hollywood for
the thousandth anniversary screening of Jury Duty 2. How come I'm
not there?
Fry: I woke you up early, so we could hang out and do stuff.
Shore: Like what?
% Fry pushes a button on the probulator. Pauly Shore screams.
%
% Back at the cryotube room.
Fry: I love this job.
Bender: [Dressed as a ghost] Me, too.
% The next tube beeps.
Fry: Showtime! I'll pretend to be dying of space plague. [Gasps]
Bender: Boo?
% Fry looks at the woman inside the tube.
Fry: Michelle!
% Bender opens Fry's wallet and looks at the picture of Michelle and that ski
% instructor she was just friends with.
Bender: Oh, my God. [Takes the money and gives the wallet back]
Michelle: Fry? Is it really you?
Fry: I don't know. Is it really you?
Michelle: What do you mean you don't know? Are you you or not?
Fry: Who wants to know?
Michelle: Oh, Fry, it is you! [Hugs him. They kiss]
Bender: Boo!
[End of Act One. Act Time: 9:04 Running Time: 9:04]
Fry: I don't get it, Michelle. The last time I saw you, you were doing
great. You had just dumped me and were well on your way to getting
your life back on track. Why'd you freeze yourself?
Michelle: Oh, Fry, after you left things took a turn for the worse. I got
married.
Fry: I'm sorry.
Michelle: His name was Charles. He attended a law school so prestigious the
basketball team was coached by Ruth Bader Ginsburg. I put him
through law school by working as a dog walker for anti-social dogs.
Fry: Sorry.
Michelle: But soon after Charles graduated our marriage ran into difficulties.
% Charles tosses up his mortarboard at graduation. Michelle catches it. When
% she looks up, he's kissing another woman.
Fry: Uh, sorry.
Michelle: Desperately depressed I turned to the one thing that could lessen my
pain - a carnival. Unfortunately, a corn dog bone got lodged in the
control panel of the Spizzler and I had to ride it for eight hours.
Fry: Sorry.
Michelle: But it did give me a chance to think.
Fry: I'm sorry.
Michelle: And I remembered the last time I was truly happy. When I was with
you.
Fry: Oh. So you froze yourself to come look for me?
Michelle: No, I did it to get a fresh start. I didn't know what had happened
to you. No one did. The police were going to conduct a search but
your parents felt it was a waste of taxpayer money.
Fry: That's the same reason they kept me out of school. So, no one even
cared that I was gone?
Michelle: Not really. Except for one person. [Puts his hand on his arm]
% Romantic music starts. They hold hands and look into each other's eyes.
Fry: Who was it?
% Fry is taking Michelle on a ride on a hover scooter.
Michelle: Everything is so different.
Fry: Not everything. There's still a roach problem. [A giant roach
flies by. Fry sprays it]
Michelle: Ew!
% At the Museum of Modern Art (MOMA). A shot of a painting. Camera moves away
% to show the painting is actually tattooed on a belly off a fat guy. Other
% fat guys stand around, with different paintings on them.
Michelle: Ugh.
Fry: Nowadays, people aren't interested in art that's not tattooed on fat
guys.
Fat guy: I'm on loan from the Louvre.
% Michelle and Fry ride the hansom cab. The cabman whips the horse. The horse
% neighs. A green alien whips the cabman. The yells in a way similar to
% neighing. Michelle whimpers.
%
% Back at the Planet Express.
Leela: Please, Professor... give us our jobs back. We deserve another
chance.
Bender: Yeah. And if you won't give me another chance perhaps you'd give one
to... [Puts on the gorilla mask] Og. Gorilla Emperor of Earth.
Prof.: Sorry, Og. But I've got a new crew. [To Hermes, Amy and Zoidberg,
who are coming out of the ship] So, how was your delivery to Fantasy
Planet where everyone's fantasies come to life?
Amy: Great.
Hermes: Organized.
Zoidberg: For one beautiful night I knew what it was to be a grandmother.
Subjugated, yet honored.
Zoidberg: [To the mask, which Bender already took off] You see, Og
everything's running smoothly. Yes. And with Fry fired I can finally
leave my jigsaw puzzles out without him eating the pieces.
Leela: Forget about Fry. You could hire us back and he'd never have to
know.
Fry: [Comes in] Hey, guys.
Leela: Oh, uh, hey, Fry.
Bender: So, as Leela was saying, Fry can go shove a big old... [Leela knocks
him over the head with a phone] Ow!
Fry: I'm glad you're all here. I wanted to introduce you to my on-again,
off-again girlfriend of the past thousand years Michelle.
% Everyone applauds weakly.
Fry: Michelle, this is Leela. [Michelle screams] This is Bender.
[Michelle screams even louder] The Professor... [The professor waves.
Michelle looks at Fry, he nods. Michelle screams] Hermes and Amy.
Michelle: Nice to meet you.
Fry: And this is Dr. Zoidberg. [Zoidberg screams and runs away]
% Later, in the next room.
Hermes: Dating your ex, Fry? Have you lost all self-respect?
Fry: All what?
Prof.: This can only end badly, Fry. Kids, a house...
Bender: A home invasion by a former roommate.
Fry: But things are different this time. Before, she was demanding and
possessive. But now she wants me to do stuff and stay with her all
the time.
% At the meeting table, Michelle and Amy drink coffee. Zoidbergs serves them.
Zoidberg: There you go, dearies. [Laughs suspiciously]
Michelle: [After suppressing the shaking in her hands] It's a relief to meet you,
Amy. I'm just having a hard time adjusting to all the strange stuff
here in the future.
Michelle: I'm from Mars. [Michelle's hand start shaking again] I feel so out
of place here. I don't understand why Fry fits in so well.
Leela: Probably because he didn't fit in back in your time.
Michelle: That's true. But I used to fit in really well.
Zoidberg: Then good luck, sister. [Shrieks]
% Michelle drops her cup. It breaks and the coffee spills. But a second later
% the cup is thrown back up, as if unharmed. Even the coffee gets back into it.
% Michelle whimpers.
%
% At the cryotube room.
Michelle: Don't take this the wrong way, Fry but your friends are a bunch of
freaks.
Fry: Yeah. They're great, huh?
Michelle: I just don't belong here. I don't know anyone. I can't find a
vanishing cream that doesn't make me actually vanish. I don't even
have a job.
Fry: Oh, right. I was supposed to assign you a job. Let me just get your
career chip installed. Hold out your palm. [Points the chip
implanter at her. Michelle gasps and hides her palms] What are you
scared of? It's just like getting your hand pierced.
Michelle: This world is horrible. Let's start over, Fry. We'll go someplace
where all we have is each other.
Fry: Ooh. Romantic. I'll tell Bender to meet us there.
Michelle: It's not a there... it's a then. The future.
Fry: Whoa, whoa, girl. I thought you were talking about one of those
motels where the bed is shaped like stuff.
Michelle: I love you. Don't you love me?
Fry: Well, sure. To the extent a man can love a woman. But this seems
like a big step.
Michelle: Fry, why must you analyze everything with your relentless logic?
Nothing matters but our love.
Fry: You're right. Let's do this now and let's never regret it.
% The get into a cryotube and kiss. The tube closes and beeps, freezing them.
%
% Later. The tube beeps again and opens. They get out. They are in the middle
% of nowhere. Dead looking desert with flaming ruins is around. The sky is
% dark.
Fry: Michelle, I don't regret this but I both rue and lament it.
[End of Act Two. Act Time: 5:10 Running Time: 14:41]
Fry: The year 4000 is severely disappointing. I miss the year 3000, when
life was simple and brains flew through space and everyone ate
lasers.
Michelle: It's not that bad. Fate brought us together, and now fate brought us
here.
Fry: No, you brought us here.
Michelle: Whine some more, Fry. I really find that attractive in a man. Now,
come on, build us a shelter.
Fry: All right. Fine. Everything else sucks. At least we can have nice
place to live.
% Later. It's getting dark.
Fry: Whoo! There.
Michelle: You expect me to live in a tiny, little hole?
Fry: It'd be deeper, but I'm standing on a gopher.
% Next day. Fry and Michelle are sleeping in the hole Fry dug. Some kids come
% and start poking them with sticks.
Fry: Hmm.
Michelle: Hmm. Oh, look! Some little kids.
Fry: They'll save us. [Kids cock their guns] We're saved!
% At the kid's camp, which is located among the ruins of building. Drums beat.
% Fry and Michelle are tied together. The leader of the kids is sitting on a
% "throne" made from barrels and tires.
Boy: I'm Butch, leader of this place. I took your hole and you can't do
nothing about it.
Michelle: Okay.
Fry: Mighty Sir, we have nowhere to go. Could we please join your
society?
Butch: Well... all right. But no interfering with our grand works.
% Kids run around, play and beat up old couches. Butch looks at them and
% nods appreciatively.
Fry: I tell ya, that Butch runs a pretty good civilization. I think I'll
enjoy serving under him.
Michelle: Uh! You know your problem, Fry? You're not ambitious. YOU should be
chief.
Fry: What do I need? Ulcers?
Michelle: [Capriciously] But I want power. I'm tired of the chief's girlfriend
lording it over me with her fancy coyote hide.
Fry: All right, all right. If it'll make you happy, I'll overthrow
society.
Butch: [Laughs] On what grounds do you challenge my authority?
Fry: Well, I'm older than you. I can beat you up.
Kids: [Murmur agreeingly] Yeah, I bet he could. He's got arm hair.
Butch: All right, Grandpa, there's only one way to settle this.
Death-rolling! [Ominous music. Kids cheer]
Fry: What's death-rolling?
Kid: It's like skateboarding.
Kid 1: Except half the time, someone dies.
Fry: Oh, so it's a little safer than skateboarding. [Showcase smile]
% Fry and Butch at the top of half-destroyed building. Fry's on a skateboard,
% Butch is on a hoverboard.
Butch: Last one holding the bandanna is the new leader.
Michelle: [To Fry] My mother always said you were a loser, Fry. Now get out
there and prove her wrong.
Fry: Beth said that?
Girl: Ahad... Steim... Shalosh!
% They go. After passing some ruins they get on a highway. A couple of armed
% cars pass them, shooting at each other. Both cars roll over and catch fire.
% Fry barely dodges another armored car. After hitching a ride with a couple
% of cars going their way, they get off the highway and meet with a lamppost.
% They both scream, the bandana wraps around the lamppost and they hit their
% heads on each other. When the dust settles they both still hold the bandana.
Butch: It's cool. Back off! My knee, I scraped it. [Cries]
Fry: Aw, poor little guy. Let me just take look at... [Pulls the bandana
out of Butch's hand] Ah-ha! I won! [Starts a victory dance] I'm
the new chief! I'm the tallest and I weigh the most!
Butch: [Takes out his gun] Hand it over, you giant idiot.
% A car stops nearby and honks.
Girl: Hey, Butch, your mom's here.
Butch: Aw, man.
Woman: Come on, kids! You're late for Hebrew school!
% Kids grumble, but get in the car. The car leaves.
Fry: I find this post-apocalyptic wasteland very confusing. Seriously,
I'm weirded out.
Michelle: That's because you're a loser. You were a loser in the year 2000 and
you're a loser in the year 4000.
Fry: Yeah, but in the year 3000 I had it all: several friends, a
low-paying job, a bed in a robot's closet. I envied no man. But you
wrecked everything.
Michelle: Quit standing up for yourself, Fry. When we get back to the hole, we
are going to have a long, boring talk about our relationship.
Fry: Oh, yeah?! Well, listen to this! [Whispers] I'm leaving you.
% He walks off in the opposite direction. He walks through a dead wasteland,
% breathing heavily.
Fry: There must be people somewhere.
% Once he gets to the top of the hill, he sees two beams moving in
% the distance. He trips and rolls down the hill. After some more walking
% he groans and falls to his knees.
Fry: Yes! Footprints! And handprints? But... what's happening?
% He's at LOEW'S QUADAFFI'S MANN'S GRAUMAN'S CHINESE THEATER.
% Planet Express ship lands nearby. The crew comes out.
Leela: Fry! Thank God we found you.
Fry: Leela, what are you guys doing here in the year 4000?
Leela: It's not the year 4000.
Bender: You were only frozen for two days. Uh, by the way, I broke your bed.
Prof.: You were in Pauly Shore's tube and they were delivering it to his
movie screening.
% Shot of the sign:
%
% JURY DUTY II:
% TROUBLE ON THE HUBBLE
% STARRING DR. PAUL SHORE
% 1000th ANNIVERSARY GALA!
Leela: But when they noticed that you weren't him, they chucked you in a
ditch.
Fry: So you're saying these aren't the decaying ruins of New York in the
year 4000?
Prof.: You wish. You're in Los Angeles.
Fry: But there was this gang of ten-year-olds with guns.
Leela: Exactly. You're in L.A.
Fry: But everyone is driving around in cars shooting at each other.
Bender: That's L.A. for you.
Fry: But the air is green and there's no sign of civilization whatsoever.
Bender: He just won't stop with the social commentary.
Fry: And the people are all phonies. No one reads. Everything has
cilantro on it.
% A limo swings by. The window rolls down revealing Michelle and Pauly
% Shore inside.
Fry: Michelle, baby.
Michelle: It's not working out, Fry.
% The limo drives off.
Shore: 'Tis better to have loved and lost, n'est-ce pas?! [Cackles]
% Planet Express ship is on the way back.
Fry: That's it. I've had it with women. From now on, I'm concentrating on
my career. Can I have my old job back?
Prof.: Why, I've forgotten why I even fired you.
Bender: 'Cause he destroyed your business, your home and all your
possessions.
Prof.: Oh, that's right. Get lost! [Pulls lever]
% Fry drops through the hatch that opens in the floor.
[End of Act Three. Act Time: 6:57 Running Time: 21:38]
Capsule authored by "Me".
{} "Me"
{JK} Joe Klemm
{D} Dave
{ES} Eric S.
{LF} Larry F
{JP} Jonathan Papish
{RJM} Robert J. Muldoon
{MH} Michael Herzog
TV Guide synopses by TV Guide
Opening Theme cartoon information from:
http://www.palmy.net.nz/futurama/opening/
The capsule has been compiled and the transcript written by Me whose name I prefer not to mention..
You can do whatever you want with this capsule, but be reasonable.